Monday, December 24, 2012

A New Way of Christmas - Merry Christmas Eve :)

I am home for the holidays.  Everyone knows I always get so excited to come home, see my family and friends and enjoy the holidays.  This year it just doesn't feel normal. It doesn't seem like Christmas to me, it's rainy and gross out. Here it is Christmas Eve, and I've been alone for the whole afternoon. Granted, this is the first year my parents are divorced officially. My father is still with the lady - his GF now - and is clearly delusional for thinking I don't know. This is my first Christmas without my girls as I wasn't allowed to bring them home - they can't stay at Broski & SIL's house and my father told me he didn't want to be "tied down" to them being there. Really he just doesn't want to tell me B moved into his house and doesn't want me around her. I don't talk about my parents divorce or my relationship with anyone really. But, here is what I've learned - at 26, and because you're an adult, everyone wants you to instantaneously be "OK" with that is going on.  When you find out your father has a GF and your folks are going to split, you're just suppose to be mad/angry for a minute or two then play like everything is ok; however, I am not ok with it.  There is a lot more to it, but what I'm figuring out is it's really hard to go from thinking your father hung the moon to not really wanting to even deal with him as you feel like a "after thought". And although I have a whole lot more I could say, I'll spare you and instead share the highlight of my trip here so far. :) Positive thoughts, right?

I got in Saturday early afternoon. I was greeted by these two babes - my Tank & my Princess. These kids mean the world to me and no matter anything else going on, they will always be my main priority.

After spending some quick hugs and loves - I had to get ready to do something really hard.




This past week, my best friend, Boo, father passed away unexpectedly. He was a great man. He was a god loving man and you saw that in his marriage and in his life. I really enjoyed my time with him and am heart broken for my boo and her family, but they are some of the strongest and most faith blessed people I know, and I know they will be fine!

Sunday started with a fabulous brunch at Tomato Head with KS then we ran errands. I finished my Christmas shopping and picked up some eye make-up remover and a sweet navy blue blazer for uniform Mondays at school.  My awesome day ended with me having an awesome dinner date at Red Robin with my handsome nephew - just us - and a Skype chat with one of my favorite people, Andrew :)

That brings me to today - no box here was open for a WOD, which is probably better as my hip is still really acting up and WDW MARATHON WEEKEND  is coming soon - 20 days!! I snuggled with the Princess for a bit this morning and that's really it. I've been wrapping the last few of my presents that needed it, and my Broski's presents. They are at SIL's parents house then meeting with my father. It's time to learn a New Way of Christmas in the family, and I'm just not on board with it, and life will go on!

Now here is what I do know--I'm ready to re-focus my life on things that benefit me and my life - CrossFit, running, biking, TRI season and my life in general. Time to set new goals and figure out my plans for 2013 :)

Merry Christmas Eve :)

~xoxo
M

2 comments:

  1. I made it a point this year to not let anyone or anything ruin Christmas with my kids. Christmas is my favorite holiday and you only get it once a year. I really wanted to enjoy it so I removed all negativity from my life for the past month. It's actually been nice. No one ruined my Christmas ;) I'm on board with you about 2013. Can't wait to follow along with you in the new year :)

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    Replies
    1. That's awesome about removing negativity. I think that's important for everyone to know. Can't wait to follow along with you as well :)

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